Ask a Pastor Column

Presenting biblical answers to tough questions

Q: I have heard people say “I can forgive but I never forget.” Does forgiving require forgetting about the hurt also?

A: I don’t think that it’s possible for us to forget about sin in the modern sense of the word. Painful and traumatic events burn a strong “memory tag” in our brains. Our bodies and brains want us to remain mindful of that hurtful situation so we don’t repeat it in the future! People who have been hurt by sin will carry the scars and the memory of what happened. Being told to “forgive and forget” often just reinforces the pain memory response if we don’t understand the biblical...

 

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