The Superior Express -

Duke is doing well after staying the better part of last week with the vet. We took him, along with the “thick” credit card last Tuesday. He came home on Friday and is now the happy bouncy puppy I was hoping for. He chews or tries to chew on everything, including me and George. Bob our cat, loves taunting him from under the bed in the spare room because Duke knows he will follow him under the bed and get in trouble. LOL! He has only gotten stuck under there once, and I was laughing so hard I almost couldn’t get him unstuck.

Although I now have an expensive mutt, and I am not sure how I will get Duke’s “hotel stay” paid off in a timely fashion, I still have no regrets. He is exactly what I needed.

I have been depressed, and for how long I’m unsure. It’s been a year, maybe a little longer since I was diagnosed with Fibromyalgia. Leave it to me to have a disease no one can figure out, has no actual treatmen, and comes with a long, long list of symptoms. I know I’m not the only one in the world who has it, and honestly, that’s not why I’m depressed.

Clinical depression is not being sad, gloom, or dismal. It’s a chemical thing. Stress, pain and anxiety can cause all kinds of weird reactions in a person. I’m not sad, I don’t feel sorry for myself, I still value my life and all the good things in it, I just don’t have my usual gusto! I bottle things up, like a fine wine, lost in a cellar of a crumbling Italian castle. I know it’s hard to believe, but I am surprised I haven’t bitten my tongue off. There is a lot I don’t, and won’t say. So I am not all that shocked that I’m clinically depressed.

I was a little taken aback by my first anxiety attack. Let me say that was no fun. I was taking a basket of laundry upstairs to put away and my chest tightened, my heart started pounding, I broke out in a sweat and couldn’t breathe. I thought I was having a heart attack. Me being me, I just sat down on the stairs and did some deep breathing with my phone at the ready to dial 911, just in case.

Took me a bit, but I finally put all the signs together and got myself into the doctor. I got an inhaler and a “chill pill.” LOL! Knowing is half the battle, and now I just have to work through it, and Duke is helping with that. He is a distraction from the thoughts in my head; which is a labyrinth of complete chaos and disorder.

So far puppy training is going well, George says he cries for at least 15 minutes every time I leave the house. I hope he gets over that, because I don’t want him to be sad, and he can’t go everywhere with me. We are learning to play fetch. He is not so good at the “bring it back” command, but we will get there. He is doing well on a leash, and is getting the hang of “heal.” He is not there yet, but a few more times out and he will be.

I can’t wait to get him out and about to meet everyone. We have had to keep him home because he may have still been contagious to other dogs, but we are all better now. Love to all, X’s & O’s.